You know you’re in Texas when:
- Taking the tollway means you can haul ass
- You measure distance in time, not miles
- You’re not considered a real driver until you’ve survived Houston in rush hour traffic
- At least one member of each couple drives a pickup
- You take a road trip, and the longest part is getting out of Texas
Ya’ll, I’m telling yu’uns, these Texas roads are not for the faint of heart. We have been here in Texas for about a month now, and I can’t tell you how many times I have pooped my drawers driving on these roads. The speed limit is about 110 I’m pretty sure, and you have to be REALLY good at merging at high speeds to not die. I’m from the mean streets of Chicago and this place puts us wimpy Chicagoans to shame! We’ve been to Dallas, Austin, Houston, San Antonio and they are all the same. They have these things call “feeder roads”, where you boogie down the highway at about 110, see your feeder road, and have to jump off to get to the store you want to go to. Which is not all that bad. What’s way worse is getting back ON the highway from the feeder road. Its a ramp on the left side of the road, and you have to get your car going up to 110 in the 14 feet of highway that they give you before you have to merge with the other guys coming at you from behind at 110. Insane I tell ya! I honestly do not know how people do this every single day to get to work and back, and survive it. I can’t even imagine handing my 16 year old the keys to the car and saying, “Here ya go Son, have a great night”, without chewing all my fingernails off all night long waiting for him to come home.
And then, to try and figure out HOW to get anywhere! All of these “feeder roads” are one way, since you are hopping off the highway and onto them. So then, if you are on this side of the highway going one way to get to your store, how in the heck do you get back home??? Because when you leave that store you have to continue going that same one way, which is the OPPOSITE way of how to get home! THANK GOD for GPS! Seriously, I have no idea how anyone ever survived without GPS if they lived in Texas!! There is no way you could drive, merge, go 110 MPH, and read your map at the same time without killing yourself! And I certainly wouldn’t wanna be the guy who has to draw out those maps – unless you are really good at drawing pictures of spaghetti bowls!
So today we head west once again, to the quieter side of Texas. We are heading out of San Antonio and will stop at Big Bend National Park for a day or two before rolling on toward New Mexico and then Arizona.Texas is a very special place indeed – the people here have a real pride in their state that you can feel in the vibe everywhere you go. We’ve been to some great places, like The Houston Ballet, The Alamo, The USS Texas, The San Antonio Riverwalk, and we’ve spent time with some very precious people who call Texas home – you know who you are, and we love you all very much! We’ve met some new folks who have shown us what true southern hospitality is all about, and we cannot thank them enough for all of their kindness. It’s been a GREAT visit, but we’re ready to leave the busy city life behind and see some mountains and dessert. We will surely miss Texas, but it’s time for these nomadic hearts to roll on. We will surely be back some day though!